Granny in 1967"Cross my hand with silver pretty lady, if you'd see,
What the future holds in store for you and how soon you will be free,
Cross my hand with silver (if you have none don't be shy)I'll take it out in food or booze (or Gordon's Special dry)
Just cross my hand with silver or call at Cell Fifteen
With any simple offering, (be sure you are not seen)
No cumshaw ever comes amiss but if you have it handy
The fates show true benevolence if first well laced with brandy,
The lines engraved upon your palm are clear as mud to me,
There's fame and food and fortune and a journey on the sea
But a lurking danger threatens and a white-haired lady frowns,
(It isn't Eve or Nella and it isn't Mrs. Chowns.)
Fate draws a veil across the name, but one thing's plain to see,
The danger is averted if you put your shirt on me.
"Scene One: Nixon Living Room Montreal November 1967
SOUND: Television, (Murdersville episode of The Avengers TV Series from November 1967) someone being dunked in water and crunch of eating
Voice on TV: (sx water) You could spare yourself this Mrs. Peel. (sx splash)You know what we want (sx Splash) Who knows you are here?
Martha: Dorothy , depeches-toi,come say goodbye to your grandmother. This is your last chance to see her. She’s leaving for the airport very early tomorrow morning
Dorothy : (sx crinkling of cellophane bag, crunch of junk food being chewed)
Martha: And, adjust the rabbit ears on the TV for Heaven’s sake. All that interference. Mrs. Peel's face is covered in snow!
MUSIC:Red Rubber Ball. The Cyrkle 1966
Scene Two: 2008 kitchen near Montreal Canada
SOUND: food sizzling on stove, radio din, cell with Ode to Billy Joe ringtone.
Dorothy: Blair. Get my cell, would you?
Blair: (distant)grunt
Dorothy: Aghh. Geez. (sx clunk of pan) Hello?
Denise: Dorothy. It’s your Aunt Denise.
Dorothy: Hi. I know. I was just thinking of you, actually. I’m listening to a BBC Documentary - about My Lai. On my laptop. 40th anniversary of the year 1968. Big year in the US. Of course, 1967 was our big year -here in Canada.
Denise: Radio Four, I presume. We never miss The Archers. I’ve rung to say that I received Mother’s war memoir in the post today. I want to thank you for returning it so promptly.
Dorothy: Wow. That’s fast. I just scanned the pages and saved them to CD. I still have a tonne of research to do before I can make any sense of it. Especially the spy business. Did you see that snippet I sent you from the 1963 Malaysia Who’s Who?
Denise: Yes, I did.
Dorothy: But did you notice the twenty year gap? It says Dorothy Forster Nixon: Born 1895 County Durham; Quaker Co-educational School; land girl in forestry WWI. Then it jumps to librarian, Kuala Lumpur Book Club 1935-present with mention of internment at Changi. Nothing about her domestic life as a rubber worker’s wife.
Denise: No I didn't. Odd. Well, I can't thank you enough for all you are doing for my mother.
Dorothy: Well, Granny didn’t get the recognition in the UK. No OBE or flattering obit at her death like the others involved, but she’ll have this, my humble family tribute. I’ll dedicate it to everyone written out of history.
Denise: Yes, to think that the grandchild with whom she had the least rapport is doing the most to keep her memory alive. Must ring off. Short of breath these days. Give my love to your mother.
Dorothy: I will. Bye now. Hmm. The grandchild with whom she had the least rapport. That’s one way of putting it, I guess.(sx plunk of fan, frying sound turns into applause)
Scene Three: Clanranald Elementary Auditorium, Montreal 1967
SOUND: Applause
Teacher (sx mike): Good work Mark Luxenberg and Rebecca Birenbaum. The top students at Clanranald Elementary for 1966/67 . Assembly dismissed. Have a great Expo summer. And please don’t lose your report cards on the way home. Here's Bobby Gimby to trumpet you home (sx scratch of record CA NA DA Song on cheap record player over PA system)
(sx vague sound of birds, children and car radios fade in and out as Ingrid and Dorothy walk by."C'etait Bits and Pieces par le Dave Clark Five. A Suivre Light MyFire, Les Doors... US President Lyndon Johnson meets today with Russian Premiere Alexsei Kosygin in New Jersey at what is being dubbed the The Glassboro Summit....
(sunny ID-jingle) CFCF 600 Montreal...
Silky Woman's Voice: There's a new look in telephones. The new look is the princess phone. It's little, it's lovely, it's light. It's so slender it can fit anywhere.)
Dorothy (VO): 6th grade down. One more year of elementary school to go. I walk the two blocks home to my family’s untidy upper duplex apartment on Lemon Creek Road in the dingy Snowdon district of Montreal (with its row upon row of unadorned brick buildings and only two landmarks worthy of the designation: the glamorous bejewelled Art Deco Snowdon Theatre and the glaring globoid Orange Julep Drive-in Restaurant) in the company of classmate and neighbour Ingrid Singh. Bombay born, Ealing raised, one of the many exotic new Canadians coming to live in my neighborhood.
Dorothy: Let me see your report card Ing.
Ingrid: Let me see yours first.
Dorothy: Nothing to see. Very good in every subject. Not one teacher comment.
Ingrid: Well, I got five excellents.
Dorothy: And a page and a half of teacher comments, I bet.”Ingrid talks back in class and teaches the little ones how to say words like douchebag. Please wash her mouth out with soap.”
Ingrid: H! Ha!. So, what do you want to do when we get home. Go up to Queen Mary Road and play Monkey See Monkey Do?.
Dorothy: Nah, too hot.
Ingrid: Wanna go see if that one-legged hobo is still living in the backseat of the blue Firebird in the used car lot?
Dorothy: Not allowed. And he's not a hobo. He's a war veteran.
INgrid: Spy vs. spy then?
Dorothy: Ok. But I wanna be Emma Peel this time.
Ingrid: No. I get to play Emma. I’m from England. You can be Agent 99 or Honey West.
Dorothy: I wanna be Emma. You’re from India. I’m the one who’s REALLY English. I’m a tall Yorkshire girl, just like Diana Rigg. My dad says.
Ingrid: You said you were born here in Canada. And your father in K-u-a-la Lum-pooor.
Dorothy: Makes no difference. My grandparents are from Yorkshire.
Ingrid: Is you grandmother tall like you and your dad?
Dorothy: I dunno.
Ingrid: Well,I’m much much MUCH prettier than you, so I still get to play Mrs. Peel.
Dorothy vo: Right, then. So Ingrid,with her shimmering swell of jet black hair, flawless mocha skin and blossoming Swedish curves, gets to be Emma Peel, as usual. That's because Emma Peel is really Diana Rigg, an English lady who is undeniably the most beautiful – and possibly the best TV actress on either side of the pond. At least according to critic Cleveland Amory in the April 28, 1967 issue of TV Guide Magazine, the very same issue I have tucked away as a keepsake because April 28, 1967 was also the opening day of Montreal's wonderful world's fair.
Ingrid: So, Emma goes undercover at the British Pavilion at Expo where she hides out with the Mary Quant mannequins. She’s watching out for Russian spies who want to kidnap…ah…Queen Elizabeth when she visits in two weeks. And Honey is a double agent working in the Russian Pavilion.
Dorothy: I’ve been to the Russian Pavilion. All it has inside is machines. Why can’t Honey hide out in Thailand? Their pavilion is shaped like a golden dragon boat.
Ingrid: Don’t be daft. Nothing happens in Thailand. So, my flat is the British Pavilion and your flat is the Russian Pavilion and our bedrooms are where we send our top secret transmissions. On pink princess phones.
Dorothy: I don’t have a princess phone.
Ingrid : It’s pretend!
Dorothy: Next week I won’t even have a bedroom.
Ingrid: Why?
Dorothy: Because my Yorkshire, well, Malaya, grandmother is finally coming for a visit and she gets my brother’s bedroom and he gets mine.
Ingrid: Is she coming for Expo? Is she coming to see the Queen?
Dorothy: I guess.
Ingrid: Where are you going to sleep?
Dorothy: On a cot in the dining room.
Ingrid: So, then. You’ll finally find out if she’s really tall or small.
